NE North Dakota News

In an article published on The Conversation and republished by several media outlets, Shelbie Wittie addresses the challenges parents and teachers face when trying to engage children in meaningful conversations. The piece discusses how common questions like “How was school today?” often result in brief responses such as “fine” or “nothing,” which can limit opportunities for deeper dialogue.

Wittie, who is an educator, researcher, and parent specializing in adolescent education and teacher preparation, outlines strategies for parents and caregivers to help children become better conversationalists and foster curiosity. She notes that adults frequently encounter resistance from children who may be hesitant to ask or answer questions, both at home and in the classroom. This reluctance can persist into adulthood if not addressed early.

The article suggests that one reason for these short answers is the nature of the questions being asked. Routine queries tend to signal a lack of genuine interest. Wittie recommends asking more specific, open-ended questions to encourage thoughtful responses from children.

She also emphasizes the importance of engaging with children's own questions rather than dismissing them. For example, instead of replying with “Because I said so!” when a child asks “why,” adults should acknowledge the question and share their thought process. Modeling curiosity through examples such as wondering why cats purr or discussing how to solve problems out loud helps children learn how to approach questions themselves.

Wittie points out that admitting not knowing an answer is important but should be accompanied by demonstrating how to find information using resources like books or internet searches. This approach teaches children that it is acceptable not to have all the answers and encourages them to seek out knowledge independently.

Active listening is another key strategy highlighted in the article. Wittie advises adults to repeat what they heard from a child before clarifying further, showing attentiveness even if the response goes off topic. By putting away distractions and making eye contact during conversations, adults can create an environment where children feel comfortable asking more questions.

According to The Conversation’s website, articles written by University of North Dakota (UND) scholars—including this one—are available for free republication worldwide. UND faculty members have reported positive experiences writing for The Conversation and recommend participation among their colleagues.

Faculty members or graduate students interested in contributing can refer to introductory materials provided by UND Today or contact Tom Dennis, associate director of communications at UND, or Adam Kurtz, strategic communication editor at UND, for more information via email.

“Children want to know whether the adults in their lives are genuinely interested in their day. Asking the same, rote questions each day says otherwise.”

“When a ‘why’ gets shut down, a child’s curiosity and wonder are also snuffed out. Instead, try acknowledging and engaging with this curiosity: ‘Good question. Here’s my thinking …’ or ‘Let’s talk about why this is important …’”

“If you come across a confusing passage in a book, you can show kids how to use the tools contained within the book: a glossary, table of contents or index.”

“If they give a meandering answer to your question – even if they go off topic – you can highlight what stood out to you to show that you were really listening: ‘What I really appreciated about your answer to my question was …’”

The Conversation provides explanatory journalism written by university scholars aimed at informing readers around the world without paywalls; all articles authored by UND scholars are listed on its website (https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-north-dakota-1630). In 2023 alone, faculty members from UND noted outstanding experiences sharing research through this platform with global audiences (https://blogs.und.edu/und-today/2023/03/more-than-340000-readers-worldwide/).

For additional guidance on writing for The Conversation or accessing related resources introduced by UND Today in 2022 (https://blogs.und.edu/und-today/2022/10/introducing-the-conversation/) faculty are encouraged to review these sources.